yours truly...

Dear Sarah,

           

I noticed you woke up happy today!  You put on a smile even though your daughter woke up right as you were about to join some friends for a healthy morning run.  You put in an extra effort to make yourself look pretty under a time constraint and you even made a sandwich for your husband before he ran out the door this morning.

However, I just couldn't let you have a good day today.  I made sure your daughter had a mess at the doctor today requiring you to maneuver a stroller through a very small public restroom.  I then had you wait for 35 minutes while the doctor wasted your time chit-chatting with nurses.  I know you hate this doctor, she really gets under your skin, but this was your last time seeing her, and I just couldn't let one more opportunity to frustrate you slip through my fingers.  She told you your baby was healthy and growing just fine, but followed all the booty-kissing with a list of things that might be wrong with your baby.  She always does this, but this list made you particularly alarmed and then annoyed.  The list included an x-ray for Madeline's hips even though you already paid $500 for an ultra sound to look at the exact same thing two months ago, which reported everything to be fine. It also included a heart murmur that "isn't anything to worry about but needs to be checked for the next 18 years of her life" and "an ear infection that isn't an ear infection yet but probably will be soon so we'd like you to come in every month til it goes away. OH and side note it may permanently affect her hearing.  But hey other than that stuff your baby looks great! Have a nice day!" 

You finally made it out of the doctor's office with just enough time to make it on time to your class.  Oh wait! You now have a hungry baby.  Better feed her before class.  Can't believe you appointment went an hour over! (Didn't see that one coming muah ha ha) So you fed her and gave her to Jeremy and made your way to class.  You only missed twenty minutes but it was still awkward coming in late.  Today was critique day so the class took turns critiquing each other's work.  You made a couple comments that were shut down, and it was just a little more than you could handle today, wasn't it.  Finally class got out and you found your husband and baby and the granola bar in the diaper bag, because you haven't had anything to eat yet today.  You thought your day couldn't get any worse.  Then you found out your husband had to stay on campus the rest of the day for a group project, then to take a test, and then he has to work tonight.  All you wanted was to come home with him and let him hold you and pig out on a huge thing of ice cream.  But that's not gonna happen.  You probably won't see him til tomorrow morning.  And you and your mom have given up eating sweets.  Plus let's be real, even if you could have ice cream you don't have any and you really can't afford to buy luxuries like ice cream right now.  

So you kissed your husband good bye and started for the door to walk home.  And guess what? It rained/hailed the whole way home.  Good thing the stroller has a cover over it.  But you were cold and wet.  Then the sun came out as soon as you got home.  I'm really good at sabotaging your day, aren't I.  Well I think that about sums it up.  I'd advise you not to make diner tonight because it might unexplainably burn... 

yours truly,

trying to ensure you have the worst day possible